Unmasked: My ADHD Awakening — Part 2 Finally, It All Made Sense
It’s strange how a single moment can re-frame your entire life.
Mine came in a small NHS consultation room.......but not for me.
It was for my youngest son, Ethan.
The school had suggested he might have ADHD and recommended we get him assessed. So, I did what any concerned parent would do....... I filled out all the forms (which, for someone who struggles with forms, was no small feat), and eventually, Ethan was accepted for an assessment.
When the day came, I took Ethan to see a child clinical psychologist. She observed him carefully, asked questions, and noted his responses. I watched, slightly on edge, wanting to make sure he felt safe and understood.
At the end of the session, she turned her attention toward me. Her tone softened, her words measured.
> 'It’s quite common,' she explained gently, 'that when children begin their ADHD journey, often on this journey a parent often realises and can see clearly that they might have ADHD too.'
Then she paused.
> 'In this case,' she continued, 'I don’t believe Ethan has ADHD. But based on how you have presented today, I strongly recommend that 'you' see your doctor for a referral ........and do it soon.'
I remember freezing. Then the tears came ........ not tears of sadness, but something else entirely.
A release. A floodgate opening after years of tension I didn’t even realise I had been holding.
The Shock of Recognition
Her words echoed in my mind for days.
I kept replaying the moment: her kindness, her hesitation, her certainty. It was as if she had seen straight through me ......... past the calm, composed exterior I had learned to wear ......... and glimpsed the chaos underneath.
It wasn’t about being 'caught out.' It was about being 'seen'.
When I finally followed her advice and went through the process, the diagnosis came in early 2022. At 49 years old, I was told I had ADHD.
The psychiatrist said, almost with surprise, “You have done incredibly well. You have a degree, a successful business, a family…”
I nodded politely, but inside, a wave of grief and clarity collided. Because yes, I had done well ....... but I had also been silently fighting a battle no one could see.
The Grief After the Relief
Late diagnosis brings a complicated mix of emotions ...... validation, grief, relief, and regret.
On one hand, I finally had an answer.
On the other hand, I could not help but wonder how different life might have been if I’d known sooner.
I grieved for the girl who thought she was lazy.
For the teenager who was humiliated for being ‘too chatty’ or ‘not focused enough.’
For the woman who spent decades masking, overcompensating, and burning herself out trying to appear capable.
But I also felt something new ....... compassion.
For myself. For the little girl who was wired differently in a world that never thought to ask why.
Understanding Myself Through a New Lens
With the diagnosis came a deep unravelling. I started to see how much of my life had been shaped by a nervous system in constant overdrive — always braced for rejection, chaos, or failure.
What I had called anxiety was really dysregulation.
What I had labelled as overreacting was emotional sensitivity.
What I had internalised as inconsistency was a brain wired for intensity and curiosity, not linear focus.
The more I learned, the more I began to forgive myself.
I saw how my patterns — the people-pleasing, the perfectionism, the endless doing- were all coping mechanisms. My way of trying to belong.
And in that understanding, something shifted.
For the first time in my life, I began to exhale.
Why This Story Matters
So many women discover their ADHD this way, by accident, through their children.
They have been holding families, businesses, and lives together for years, quietly wondering why it all feels harder than it should.
If that’s you, please know:
You are not behind.
You are not broken.
You simply have not been taught how to thrive in a world that wasn’t built for your brain.
To Be Continued
In next week’s final instalment, I’ll share what came after the diagnosis and how I began rebuilding from the inside out, working with my energy rather than against it, and discovering what alignment truly feels like.
Because diagnosis is not the end of the story.......... it is the beginning of knowing who you really are.
Stay tuned for Part 3: Rebuilding from Truth.
If my story resonates, join me for my free ADHD Awareness Masterclass.
I’ll be sharing how I moved from dysregulation and burnout to clarity, calm, and confidence using a nervous-system-first approach. Reserve your place ➜ HERE
Missed Part on of the 3 Part Blog Series? Catch Up HERE